A scouser is a rascal, scallywag and footpad from the city of Liverpool.

And we also get Shakespeare stuffed down our throats but some great books too such as "Wind in the Willows" which led to a rather unfortunate rodent and amphibian fetish but that is another story...

So Joe and Larry what you've probably realised is that United Kingdom is a misnomer and each region, town, street has nothign good to say about the next one.

A little Welsh joke now: "This morning I was feeling dreadful and feeling as if I might vomit anyway when I was shaving I looked at the mirror and realised I'm not English and felt much better".

Another: "Q: What do you call 100 Englishmen at the bottom of the sea? A: A start"

And to balance things just a little "What do you call a sheep tied to a lampost in Wales? A: A leisure centre" (Note my colonial friends that centre is spelt properly in the UK).

Imagine if I wanted to be truly offensive...

Cheers

Huw who is going into hiding....

Strikes me our cousins from the Province have come out of this relatively unscathed......so.......
Evolving from Piltdown we have Strabane Man ....... probably my favourite Irishman

Filled with passion........you just can't help liking him

What the..........???

Before I travel over there I will PM several of you all to see if someone there is free to be my guide and interpreter! If not, I'll strike out on my own with a map, compass, and sandwich!

Joe

Hi Joe a scouser is someone born on the east bank of the Mersey within the boundary of the city.

Racists from outside that area who hear the regional accent, usually Irish gypsies from Kent, attribute this name to the voice without the inside knowledge of 'da roolz'.

The word scouser drives from the Norwegian word lobbscouse, a form of meat, potato and vegetable stew which is a local dish served with hot bread and butter, beetroot or pickled red cabbage, warm, welciming and wholesome as this simple fare is; it mirrors perfectly the attitude and welcome offered by the native folk.

On Merseyside there is a 'uniform used by those horrible people of late teenage that are the dregs of the community that live on all city street corners and you know are up to no good with the bonus identifying smell of skunk cannabis are known as 'Scallies' they wear Blacktracksuit bottoms, North face hoodies and ride bycicles so they can scatter in seconds in all directions, forgetting the police just follow the smell if their drugs.

The word derivation here is Scallyrwagge from the
Scandic words:-
'Scalliya' meaning West Saxon or West Midlander and 'Waggiyarra' meaning bearded wanderer.

I hope this is helpful, some of it is even factually correct.
Paul.

Paul

Hey Joe, you may as well begin here in Liverpool then.
currently there has been an enormous influx of tourism over the last ten years.
When the new cruise liner terminal opens next year it is gonna be great to see so many fine and graceful big ships back on the waterfront, we already get some but not 3 a week
The reason I tell you this, is that local folks are convinced the descendants of the 630,000 people that transited through Liverpool en-route to America 150 years ago, are now sneaking back in "1 boat at a time"

Paul

No, don't hide, Huw, stand up and be counted! I'll stand with you I've been the brunt of anti-Taffy 'humour' most of my life, but truth to tell, it's mostly been light-hearted.

Alan

You are right Alan all meant in fun.

My favourite is :-

one Welshman...good conversation
two Welshmen....good company and great conversation.
three Welshmen..........a bloody choir!

Paul Bach

Too right! I'd forgotten that one, thanks, Paul.
I had an old uncle who's grasp of the finer points of syntax, in English, made for some odd quotes. Like, "Where were you going when I saw you coming home last night?" And a classic, on breaking wind very loudly, " O, Duw, shit myself have you ?"

Alan

An Englishman, Welshman, an Irishman and a Scotsman, went into a pub. .......

They bought a drink and had a laugh.

Is this surprising?

Mark.

Who got the round in?

Depends where the Englishman come's from whether he buys a round
Two of the tightest bas****ds I ever came across both uncles one from Froom and the other
From yorkshire

Being a generous Yorshireman I would buy you a pint anytime Ron.

This is when they started fighting.... but had a laugh whilst doing so.

Its a start.

Mark.

I just new you would be watching Roger

My theory is that the Englishman was only invited because he'd offered to get the round in...

I'll buy you one at S&L... oh hang on a minute I'm at sea. Ask Richie to get you one from me and I'll pay him back when I see him next.

Offered and actually doing so are two different things, see my previous post Huw.

I agree apart from one twit who at the end of a job interview said I was qualified and would have had the job if he wasn't concerned I would want to move back to Wales in the future. I thanked him for his time and for his valuable feedback which made it clear I didn't want to work for him and he could stuff the job up his arse. I got up and left.